Back by popular demand! No, that’s not true even a little bit because only one person has indicated with words to tell me they enjoy reading such lists; and by the same token, the person is a family member so it doesn’t really count since they tell you you’re doing good regardless of your circumstances.
So what’s a tell-it-like-it-is writer like me to do? Here goes nothin’:
. . . rewinding back to my early teens, my friend and I seized the chance since we were home alone and took an illegal joyride in my relatives’ vehicle that they left at our house (after one of my parents drove them to the nearby airport for their flight for a vacation), and I let her drive around town even though she was underage and didn’t even possess a permit?
. . . after one of my countless excruciatingly tough health episodes, my bone marrow transplant physician Dr. Yanik finally conceded and allowed me to have Mexican food I desperately craved, because I had already fallen so far beyond the limits of even just being considered severely ill, it really didn’t make one teeny crumb of difference if I added spicy beany cheesy food to the mangled mess of myself?
. . . once I put some tomato soup in my plastic hat in the toilet (used to measure input and output in the hospital) to mix with what was already in there just to freak out my nurse?
. . . I used to have an ENORMOUS and secret-so-this-is-probably-my-family’s-first-time-hearing-this (as well as other items on this revealing list) crush on likewise left-handed Prince William Arthur Philip Louis born on June 21, 1982, so much so that as a young teen home by myself one day I eagerly snatched the opportunity to walk a few blocks to the neighborhood drugstore to buy a special new ten-dollar issue of PEOPLE magazine featuring huge colored photographs of my handsome blondie?
. . . when I answer the phone to hear a solicitor speed-talking and trying to sell me something on the other end, I feign stupidity and tell them I’m under 18, so they hang up quicker than you can blink?
. . . still in a very frail health condition with a severely weakened immune system unable to fight off germs in the outside world, my team of bone marrow transplant doctors, had they known, would certainly have unwaveringly opposed my actions if they knew that less than six months after my first bone marrow transplant at age 16 in 2000, I was already both attending my junior year of high school and holding down my first (and only) job as a sales associate at the mall (although I’m a fighter and would never have taken no for an answer)?
. . . in 2004 I traveled on a long 14-hour road trip with my Mom – who stayed awake by consuming Coke, lots of red licorice, and loudly singing out-of-tune with the radio (sorry, Mom, but it’s true) – to Boston to be fitted for special lenses (that my awesome advocate and Mom discovered online) that were so fresh on the market that a doctor all the way from Israel was also at the world renowned nonprofit eye health care organization called the Boston Foundation for Sight to learn about and be trained in using the newly invented lenses?
. . . back when I was 16 and drove, I waited a good part of the day before telling my parents I got my first speeding ticket at two in the morning the night before because one, I was in shock and two, I thought the whole thing was kind of ridiculously funny?
. . . as a baby, our close family friend Leah – who I call and treat as my little sister – got dropped off at the hospital to visit me (and even nap in my hospital bed, which I was more than glad to exit for her to use) on so many occasions that my doctors eventually forbade her from visiting me and further risking my totally wiped out immune system?
. . . my friends John and Kathy Sternfels, who I’ve known since I was a child and we lived in the same neighborhood in Redford (where my oldest sister went to their middle son’s fifth grade pool party where boys weren’t allowed to splash girls), were promised at NorthRidge Church on Sunday, March 23, that I’d put them on this list in my favorite color of blue ink?
. . . I fell asleep with a water bottle filled with boiling hot water, and due to the left side of my body having the side effect of decreased sensitivity so I can’t feel certain things including the difference in hot and cold liquid temperatures, I woke up to find three huge blisters on my left calve where it had fallen?
. . . since my sister made a reference to this mischievous moment on FB after my second “Did you Know . . . ” blog post on March 22 – by the way, thanks for the reminder, Carrie – and because it’s quite fitting in such a list as this, I will now reveal: When we were girls growing up, after my oldest sister Carrie was acting quite bossy, I thought, and repeatedly insisting that I refill her spray water bottle for her so she could remain sunbathing in her swimsuit on our deck one heated summer day, I finally acquiesced to her demands, only to gleefully watch her unknowingly squirt sticky apple juice instead of refreshing water all over her body?
. . . the one time I drank a beer in my life, a Michelob Ultra, the beverage was gulped down quickly at my out-of-town friends’ house after we were out and a random lady COMPLETELY IGNORED ME – very rudely treating me like some insignificant loser who is too stupid to talk or think for herself even though I was standing right next to my friend plain as day – and asked my friend “what was wrong” with me, and so I very much needed to try to alleviate the colossal stress of the horrible encounter, kick back with a cold one and unwind (btw, the refreshment I’m not used to drinking went straight to my head and caused the eruption of an abundance of uncontrollable giggling)?